Sunday, April 26, 2009

Fertility Yoga

Tonight I am going to start of workshop on Fertility Yoga. I have only done yoga about 3 times in my entire life, but this sounds like a great class. It seems like it will be a great workshop. I believe that I was meant to take this workshop. A friend of mine sent me the link. She received the e-mail from being on an yoga e-mail list when she was pregnant. She had taken some pre-natal yoga classes. The more I looked into this fertility yoga class I realized that it is literally less than a mile from our house and sounds like just what I need.

Part of the class description:
"Nutritional Weight and Wellness, a healthy home healthy surroundings segment, a Maya abdominal massage therapist, an acupuncturist, a family therapist, and we'll have lots of time for yoga and meditation as well."

J. asked me when I told him about the class if it was a class for people struggling to get pregnant. I am assuming that is the case since it is called fertility yoga. I guess it could be for people who aren't necessarily struggling to get pregnant but rather just beginning to TTC. I guess I will find out tonight. As long as I'm not there with a bunch of women with growing bellies I will be fine.

The rain just set in here. Good day to be lazy.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Announcement and Showers

Last night J. came home and told me of an announcement he received at work. A co-worker who had been struggling with infertility said that he and his wife were pregnant. They had tried 2 unsuccessful IVF cycles and got pregnant on a "break" on their own. Silly doctors! He seemed very cautious last night about telling me. Obviously since we found out about our failed attempt on Monday he was right in being cautious. I was fine. Some how I can take it easier to hear about couples who have struggled as much or more than we have than someone who was off the pill for a month or so. But, when J. got home today he shared with me that when this co-worker made the official announcement to the entire office he felt that pain of jealousy and hurt that it wasn't us making the announcement. This is the first time he has felt this way. I sympathized with him and said "it sucks, doesn't it?" I wouldn't wish these feelings on anyone and I'm sorry he is going through it. But, I am partially thinking that he will understand me and my feelings better now that he has experienced the same pain from an announcement.

Today was our annual baby/wedding shower at school. We honor and celebrate everyone in the school on one day. Last year my grade level had to plan the event - Ugh! This year I was happy I didn't have to be a part of it. I put my donation into the envelope for the gifts when they came around. I used the quiet time in my classroom to do some planning. About a half hour into the party one of my dear co-workers who knows what we have been going through brought me a cup of punch and a piece of cake. I apologized for not attending and she said, "don't think a second thought about it. I know it must be hard on you that is why I brought the cake to you." She is the BEST!!!! The cake was really good too!

I went on a run after school today. The cysts are sore to run with so it was more of a run/walk. But, I made it around the lake we live by - about 3 miles round trip from our house. I need to do that more. I feel great and I bet I will sleep good tonight - the red wine I'm sipping with help that too! :-)

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Hello ICLWers

Quick update:
I got my period on Friday half way through the day. It was way more than just implantation spotting. I kept my Beta testing and ultrasound appointment for Monday. The Beta confirmed the negative pregnancy test. I have huge cysts on my ovaries as well again. They really hurt this time so there is no doubt I will start the pill and I have been taking lots of Advil.
I am feeling okay about this. I think I had so many days of spotting that I had prepared myself for it. Of course I’m sad and wish that we didn’t have to do this again, but I feel like I am handling it better this month. We have an appointment scheduled with an RE on May 3rd. We saw him last year and he said to stay the course. We are going to see what he will say after it’s been another year of TTC, miscarriage and such.
There are only 34 more days (yes I’m counting) left to the school year. I have had a challenging year and I’m certain a summer of some stress free days and rest will help. We are feeling certain we would like to do IVF this summer and we are hoping the RE agrees to take us. Now it is just figuring out how to pay for it. . . Maybe we shouldn’t have gone on that spring break trip. . . Oh, well it was good for our marriage at the time.
Welcome to my blog!

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Random thoughts and feelings

So many things running through my mind right now I'm just going to list them:
  • Today at lunch my very nice, considerate co-worker was talking with me about what I have heard about my teaching placement for next year. My snotty co-worker who has always been nothing but cold me to said "You should just get pregnant and stay home."  She knows I had a miscarriage this fall. UGH! I just wanted to slap her!
  • I made a call to my very good friend today to ask her how things were going at home with her baby that was bornon March 6th. I asked lots of questions about her and the baby. It was a nice conversation and I felt good about touching base with her even though it is hard for me to her about the baby. She sent me a text message that said this: "I didn't even ask about you. . .did you want to talk about anything? Dave asked how you were doing and I said fine, but I guess I don't know for sure. . ." I haven't responded to that yet. I'm not sure how to. Suggestions?
  • I was flipping channels and came across one of those TLC shows of a family with 10+ kids. I got to thinking, why don't they have stories abou couples that have troubles having even one kid?
  • I had a little bleeding and cramping today. . . this concerns me a bit because I woke up this morning and remembered that I forgot to take my progesterone pill last night. We were at the Twins baseball game and it went to 11 innings. We got home late and I went right to bed. I completely forgot to take it. I can't believe that missing it just one day would have done something, but I'm not sure. I took it this morning and I will again tonight - hopefully that isn't too much in one day. But of course it could be that infamous implantation bleeding that people talk about. I am 10 days post IUI so that might be it.
That's about it. . .for today!

Monday, April 13, 2009


I am testing on Friday! J. doesn't want me to, but I'm doing it anyway. I'm not one of those strong people to be able to wait until the Beta test (that won't happen until next Monday). We are going out with friends Friday night to the Sugarland concert and I kind of want to know that morning if I can have some drinks or not. The past 3 IUI's AF arrived on day 13 post IUI and Friday will be day 11. It might be a bit early. . .but it is what I put in my head and I can't get it out.

It became official today that I will not be teaching at the same elementary school that I have taught at for the last 3 years. I am going to be very sad to leave this school as I love almost every part of it. I don't know what school I will be going to or what grade I will be teaching, but I do know I will have a job. That is a lot more than what other people have in their careers right now so I am trying to look on the bright side of things. It is just hard to have had the e-mail sent out to the entire school today. It made it more official to see it in print. It is also hard to deal with the unknown. There are so many unknowns circling around me right now.

Blog Award

I was nominated for a blog award by Flower! Thank you so much! I started this blog thinking no one would read it and now I have followers that are actually interested in what I have to say. It makes me sad that there are so many of us out there that need to blog about infertility, but I am thankful to have this Sisterhood of bloggers to help out with my journey.
Here are the rules:
1. Put the logo on your blog or post.
2. Nominate 10 blogs with great attitude and/or gratitude.
3. Be sure to link to your nominees in your post.
4. Let your nominees know they have received the award by leaving them a comment on their blog.
5. Be sure to link this post to the person who nominated you for the award.
I nominate the following blogs: