And the Winner was . . .Plan B

And I really didn’t need to convince them. I went in on Thursday morning for another follicle ultrasound and she said that one more day would be ideal but since we were leaving town she felt good about doing it on Saturday. So I did the trigger shot on Thursday night and we did the IUI on Saturday morning. Then it was off to Madison for the half marathon. It was good to be sitting in a car for 4 hours and not moving or being stressed – I was able to relax and let the little swimmers do their job!

 

We had a great time in Madison. J. rocked at his first half marathon – 1 hour and 43 minutes. If you know anything about half marathons that is a really good time! Brat fest was after the race so we sat out in the sun with a brat and a beer and just enjoyed the day!

 

I’m so glad things worked out this way. We did a lot of baby dancing on our own this weekend. It was a lot of fun since we were in a hotel and in a different town. It always seems like the stresses you might have going on at home go away and you are less distracted. If the IUI didn’t do it this weekend, I’m really thinking all our baby dancing did! J

 

Thank you for all the well wishes and support! Hopefully I will have good news to report in 2 weeks. I also hope the next two weeks go by fast. It is the last 2 weeks of school and my 2 ww.

 

 

Turn of Events

I thought I had planned out our IUI to work out perfectly for this Saturday morning. I stayed on the pill so that I would get my period 11 days prior to us leaving town for J.’s first half marathon in Madison, WI.  I went in this morning for my day 8 ultra sound (which for the past 4 cycles has yielded good looking follicles) I thought for sure I would hear: “Do one more Gonal-f shot, do the trigger shot tomorrow night, and we will see you on Saturday morning for the IUI.” Nope she said that she didn’t think I was ready yet and I needed to come back on Friday to check things again. We would be doing the IUI on Sunday or Monday. WHAT?!?!? Why would this cycle all of a sudden have to be difficult and change things up for me?!?!

 

Okay, my fertile yoga class has taught me that this journey is full of gray areas, so I have constructed some plans. I am going back in tomorrow morning to see if things change in a day. She doesn’t think they will, but I can hope. I will go back in again on Friday as well. I am crossing my fingers that all will be good tomorrow and we will proceed as I planned with the IUI on Saturday before we leave town, but if not here is my plan B, C, D. . .

 

Plan B:  I convince them to do the IUI anyway on Saturday. I know this is risking it messing things up and not working, but we can baby dance all weekend to try to get it at some point.

 

Plan C: We just don’t do an IUI this time at all and we baby dance on our own to see if we can get pregnant that way with the help of the follicle stim injections and the trigger shot (taking that as if we were doing the IUI on Sunday or Monday)

 

Plan D: J. has a friend from back home and his wife is a doctor. I could call her and plead with her to see if she could do the IUI or refer me to someone who could. Not sure that is ideal or how that would work, but I would be willing to try that route.

 

Plan E: We don’t go to Madison. This would be a huge bummer because we pre-paid for 2 nights at our hotel and we are traveling with another couple friend of ours, and this is J.’s first half marathon. I think it would be a really good weekend for us, but I know we have to think about where our priorities are.

 

Wish us luck!

 

Super fast update

I have no engery, but I realized I haven't posted in awhile so I'm going to make this quick:

- Fertility Yoga Class is FANTASTIC! The instructor is great and all the other ladies in my class are great. It is like group therapy, education, and yoga all in one. I am so glad I have done it. This last week J. came with because a nutritionist came to talk with us. It was good to have J. see who else was going through the same thing as us. It was also hard to hear about what we "shouldn't" be eating. More on that later.

- We met with the RE on Monday. We are on the path of IVF. We are going to try one more IUI this month. The plan would be that if it doesn't work we will take June to get over the cysts (that I get every month after IUI) and we will do IVF in July. There is a lot of pressure for this IUI cycle to work because IVF is really expensive. I am hoping the added pressure will scare us into getting pregnant and not the opposite.

- I went to see my family practice doctor because of the depression and anxiety I was feeling. She prescribed a low dose anti-depressant. I'm not sure if it is a placibo effect, but I am feeling a little more "numb" lately. My terrible students are not bugging me as much and I seem to be more okay with pregnant people around me. This could be all a mental thing - thinking the meds are really helping me - but I will take what I can get!

- When I was at the family practice doc she asked if I had ever had my thyroid checked. If I did I couldn't remember. So she checked it. Apparently I have hypo-thyroidism - who knew!?!?! So I'm on meds for that now too. It could have an effect on our fertility, but probably more on my moods. Maybe it will help me loose those 5lbs I have been wanting to loose.

Okay so that was longer than a short update. . .

Fertility Yoga

Tonight I am going to start of workshop on Fertility Yoga. I have only done yoga about 3 times in my entire life, but this sounds like a great class. It seems like it will be a great workshop. I believe that I was meant to take this workshop. A friend of mine sent me the link. She received the e-mail from being on an yoga e-mail list when she was pregnant. She had taken some pre-natal yoga classes. The more I looked into this fertility yoga class I realized that it is literally less than a mile from our house and sounds like just what I need.

Part of the class description:
"Nutritional Weight and Wellness, a healthy home healthy surroundings segment, a Maya abdominal massage therapist, an acupuncturist, a family therapist, and we'll have lots of time for yoga and meditation as well."

J. asked me when I told him about the class if it was a class for people struggling to get pregnant. I am assuming that is the case since it is called fertility yoga. I guess it could be for people who aren't necessarily struggling to get pregnant but rather just beginning to TTC. I guess I will find out tonight. As long as I'm not there with a bunch of women with growing bellies I will be fine.

The rain just set in here. Good day to be lazy.

Announcement and Showers

Last night J. came home and told me of an announcement he received at work. A co-worker who had been struggling with infertility said that he and his wife were pregnant. They had tried 2 unsuccessful IVF cycles and got pregnant on a "break" on their own. Silly doctors! He seemed very cautious last night about telling me. Obviously since we found out about our failed attempt on Monday he was right in being cautious. I was fine. Some how I can take it easier to hear about couples who have struggled as much or more than we have than someone who was off the pill for a month or so. But, when J. got home today he shared with me that when this co-worker made the official announcement to the entire office he felt that pain of jealousy and hurt that it wasn't us making the announcement. This is the first time he has felt this way. I sympathized with him and said "it sucks, doesn't it?" I wouldn't wish these feelings on anyone and I'm sorry he is going through it. But, I am partially thinking that he will understand me and my feelings better now that he has experienced the same pain from an announcement.

Today was our annual baby/wedding shower at school. We honor and celebrate everyone in the school on one day. Last year my grade level had to plan the event - Ugh! This year I was happy I didn't have to be a part of it. I put my donation into the envelope for the gifts when they came around. I used the quiet time in my classroom to do some planning. About a half hour into the party one of my dear co-workers who knows what we have been going through brought me a cup of punch and a piece of cake. I apologized for not attending and she said, "don't think a second thought about it. I know it must be hard on you that is why I brought the cake to you." She is the BEST!!!! The cake was really good too!

I went on a run after school today. The cysts are sore to run with so it was more of a run/walk. But, I made it around the lake we live by - about 3 miles round trip from our house. I need to do that more. I feel great and I bet I will sleep good tonight - the red wine I'm sipping with help that too! :-)

Hello ICLWers

Quick update:

I got my period on Friday half way through the day. It was way more than just implantation spotting. I kept my Beta testing and ultrasound appointment for Monday. The Beta confirmed the negative pregnancy test. I have huge cysts on my ovaries as well again. They really hurt this time so there is no doubt I will start the pill and I have been taking lots of Advil.

I am feeling okay about this. I think I had so many days of spotting that I had prepared myself for it. Of course I’m sad and wish that we didn’t have to do this again, but I feel like I am handling it better this month. We have an appointment scheduled with an RE on May 3^rd. We saw him last year and he said to stay the course. We are going to see what he will say after it’s been another year of TTC, miscarriage and such.

There are only 34 more days (yes I’m counting) left to the school year. I have had a challenging year and I’m certain a summer of some stress free days and rest will help. We are feeling certain we would like to do IVF this summer and we are hoping the RE agrees to take us. Now it is just figuring out how to pay for it. . . Maybe we shouldn’t have gone on that spring break trip. . . Oh, well it was good for our marriage at the time.

Welcome to my blog!

Random thoughts and feelings

So many things running through my mind right now I'm just going to list them:   Today at lunch my very nice, considerate co-worker was talking with me about what I have heard about my teaching placement for next year. My snotty co-worker who has always been nothing but cold me to said "You should just get pregnant and stay home."  She knows I had a miscarriage this fall. UGH! I just wanted to slap her! I made a call to my very good friend today to ask her how things were going at home with her baby that was bornon March 6th. I asked lots of questions about her and the baby. It was a nice conversation and I felt good about touching base with her even though it is hard for me to her about the baby. She sent me a text message that said this: "I didn't even ask about you. . .did you want to talk about anything? Dave asked how you were doing and I said fine, but I guess I don't know for sure. . ." I haven't responded to that yet. I'm not sure how to. Suggestions? I was flipping channels and came across one of those TLC shows of a family with 10+ kids. I got to thinking, why don't they have stories abou couples that have troubles having even one kid? I had a little bleeding and cramping today. . . this concerns me a bit because I woke up this morning and remembered that I forgot to take my progesterone pill last night. We were at the Twins baseball game and it went to 11 innings. We got home late and I went right to bed. I completely forgot to take it. I can't believe that missing it just one day would have done something, but I'm not sure. I took it this morning and I will again tonight - hopefully that isn't too much in one day. But of course it could be that infamous implantation bleeding that people talk about. I am 10 days post IUI so that might be it.   That's about it. . .for today!